Often I find it very difficult to maintain balance. People often ask me how do I do it all. Single Momma to five babies ages 13 to 3, two different school districts, daycare for the two youngest, a full time job, a photography business, youth group, etc. Really, I am not much different from many Mom's I know. Jokingly, I say that I am like the Cat in the Hat who balances everything and with one misstep it will all crash down.
I have my own little meltdowns and usually it is always about the same thing...balance. I miss being a stay at home mom. If you have the chance to do so, even for a season, I highly encourage it. With that being said, I also love my job and the other hats that I wear. Finding an ok balance that works for me has been a work in process but finally, it seems to be coming together.
So how do I do it?
1. Morning meditation and prayer. You can ask anyone that knows me closely, I am a morning person. I love mornings. However, if I do not wake up and read or listen to my morning devotion and become too busy to pray, it aint pretty people. I have to wake up and choose an attitude of gratitide and choose to put on love. Otherwise, I will most likely be spewing venom by 10am. In reality, none of us are too busy to find time to spend with God. We choose to worship the idol of busyness and wear it as some badge of marytrdom when in reality it just that...an idol and an attidude of ungratefulness.
2. Create a realistic schedule. Follow yourself around for a week and jot down how you spend your time. Are you wasting too much time on facebook or other social media outlets? Let's get real, it does suck your time and often your energy if you are falling into the drama like some soap opera. Look for ways that you can add or take away activities that will get you closer to your goals. Then write a realistic schedule that you can stick to. I include things like housework, activities with the kids and even meals on mine. When I do not follow some type of schedule things do not get done.
3. Learn to say NO! Come on, practice it with me, No! You have no business signing up to make eleventy bagillion dozen of cupcakes for the school PTA event when you know you do not have time. Now, listen, I have nothing against PTA'S or any other group but if you are signing up to do a bunch of things that will just make you miserable all while making your family subject to your misery, don't do it. Half the time we only sign up for these things so we as Mom's can be part of the COOL PTA Moms group anyways. We are more concerned with fitting in then we are with whatever benefit the bake sale items are going to be sold for.
4. Take a time out from your phone. Yep, I said it. I am horrible with my phone. I am always worried about someone trying to get ahold of me and I am not available to them. Guess what? Even if someone does call while I am away from the phone, they will leave a message. Amazing how that works. During your phone time out get your things done that you dislike doing the most. It goes that much quicker.
5. Make a to do list every night for the next day. I know many companies tell people to do this as part of goal setting training. You know why? It works. I personally love having a handwritten list so I can cross things out as I accomplish them. But you can use your smarty pants phones and gadgets too...whatever works for you.
6. Chill out. It is not that serious. Whatever you are going through is what it is. I am not saying that it isnt difficult but find something positive and cling to that truth. My friend Colleen who passed last November had a great attitude as she was fighting stage four cancer. She taught me that life is what you make of it and you can choose to make it miserable or you can handle it as it comes with a great attitude. She chose to be a rockstar at life and live like everyday was her last. So maybe you had a bad day, the kids are driving you nuts and your laundry isnt quite complete...take a deep breath, turn on some great music, dance around like a loony and purpose to get it done tomorrow. It will still be there waiting. Dont let life's busyness steal today's joy. It is so not worth it.
7. Personal Responsibility. (warning this may hurt a little) Take responsibility for the life you have created. Stop focusing on who did you wrong, the if only I could haves, woe is me nonsense... No one is required to make your life better or easier-that is your job. You are not entitled to anyone doing the work for you. So stop making excuses and and just do it.
Choose love and be blessed wildly,
Wendy xxooo
