Birthday

Over the past two years, I began a journey in fitness and health. Now, before you get too far ahead and think I am going to talk about weight loss, let me immediately say, this isn't all about that. I was at a place that was very unhealthy- spiritually, mentally and physically. Drained. Burnt out. I had very little left in my well to draw from. It was horrible. I wanted to hide and just hope that my circumstances would change, but I knew that I would be only fooling myself. On May 30th, 2012- I finally said enough is enough and change came- in the form of moving from my home to my parents 65 acre farm to live in their camper with my five kids for the summer- until I could get on my feet.

The few years prior to that, my life quickly was spiraling into shambles. It seemed that despite any efforts, the brokenness was just that- broken. I was at an all time low emotionally and an all time high weight wise for me.  The weight came with the stress and honestly the desire to just hide from the world. I couldn't stand how I felt- my blood sugar started acting a mess and I began having multiple  hypoglycemic episodes where I would get anywhere from disoriented to even short term eyesight loss until my blood sugar rose again- which caused more fear. I guess that is the best way to describe my then life- fear.

Little by little and with lots of surrender to trusting and having faith (because I had nothing else left), I began the process of healing and overall health. I quickly lost a bunch of weight leading me to where I am at today. 185 lbs. Now, first of all, as you can imagine putting that number on here for everyone to read is difficult. However, it is honest. My desire to be transparent is greater than my fear of other people's opinions. 

I spent the last year really focusing financially on staying a float. Raising five children without financial help is difficult but doable. My physical health took a back burner though and recently decided that enough was enough. I needed to get back on the job of working on my overall health. What good is a healthy mind and spirit if you are so exhausted that you cannot even do anything but live in survival mode?

In March, I met Cory. Cory is this super amazing man. Much like me, we both have made several wrong choices- different choices but not healthy to say the least. Immediately Cory and I knew that we were a great fit. Both of us are stubborn mules who just wont quit. lol. Sounds romantic right? Hey, I am promising transparency not romanticized stories. Honestly, I wholeheartedly believe that he was sent to me right from God. Ok, I could go on and on but you know what- Ill save that for later. Cory is also on this transparent journey with me and he has given me permission to say that he currently weighs 214. We are both, joined, together and fighting for overall health and total wellness. 

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12                                                                                   ⁹ Two are better than one,
    because they have a good return for their labor:
¹⁰ If either of them falls down,
    one can help the other up.

Cory's birthday is in 15 days and mine is today so we decided that we would begin to share our journey now.  From now on, all of our weight loss and physical fitness journey will be under the tab Ezer Life.  You can read about it there. I promise to share often and as honest as I can be. Like right now, I have to go and get dressed for my birthday date with Cory- shorts and a tshirt because we are working out. - No excuses!

I am sorry if this is a bit of a ramble. But I wanted to update you and fill you all in.

 

Among the Tamaracks

Across the road, still part of the property is a large field. Its backdrop are gorgeous tamaracks. Each morning the sun rises through these beautiful trees.  The morning moment is one that I look forward to and try to witness daily. A couple mornings ago, I decided to go out into the field and walk around before sunrise. It had been cold and storming, fog was still hovering over the fields which seemingly wrapped around me as I walked.   Usually, I sit in my living room and watch the beautiful sun rise above these magnificent trees and witness the light reaching all the little hidden dark places of between the branches and the field. The moment is always peaceful and refreshing. I thought for sure witnessing it outside would be the same. A sunrise service between God and I.

Despite the quietness of our home, the sound coming from all the different birds and creatures as a whole was almost deafening.  As I walked through the field for a moment of peace and solitude, I was instead greeted by the chaos of sound. It was not what I expected. Dumbfounded by the level of sound, my first instinct was to cover my ears and start to walk back towards our home.  Instead, I decided to intentionally focus on what I was listening to. I was able to drowned out all the sounds and listen to one bird at a time. The moment became much more enjoyable.

I was reminded by the moment among the tamaracks that life is a choice of chaos or intentional focus.   I have to be able to pick who I am listening to and with intention choose which activities are going to be the most beneficial and productive for my family. Boundaries are often difficult to set, often because we don't want to hurt other people's feelings, but they make the journey so much more enjoyable.

Choose love and be blessed wildly,
Wendy